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There were several physical tests on today’s schedule, including a full brain scan. They pushed me inside a sealed tube, what I found terrifying. I have always been quite claustrophobic. The idea of not being able to get out quickly makes me anxious.

I had to ly down quitly while I feld the implus of getting out as fast as possible. That restlessness made it difficult not to move. I would prefer to have three teeth extracted by an unknown dentist while that would really hurt unlike this scan. Perhaps I acted childish; I feel ashamed when I think of my behavior. Fortunately I could fully cooperate during the remaining tests so they didn’t have to take extra time for me anymore. Even the research with the Transcranial Stimulator, a sophisticated instrument that stimulated specific areas of the brain, went on easily. Everybody knows the little hammer with which a doctor ticks against the knee to test the reflexes. This Transcranial Stimulator works quite similar. Suddenly my left forearm moved up or I felt an irritating itch under my foot. Furthermore I had to jog on the exerciser while they made an E.E.G. and they took another blood sample. I guess the test results are fine. They are very seares of giving feedback, even if I ask for it. “You’re doing fine, babe!” is what I get as an answer al the time. “Don’t you worry.”

The test results will be discussed in the team meeting tomorrow afternoon. They’ll let me know the results of the negotiations the same evening. I’ll have to leave the Research Center the morning after if I’m found unsuitable for the job or I’ll have to sign a definitive contract in which I fully comply with Braintec’s experiments. In the last case I’ll be surgically operated the next morning. Then they will saw a little hole in my scull through which they can place the implant.

I’m not sure what I prefer, probably a positive outcome. For the stupid reason I don’t know what else to do. That’s a reason I can’t accept but I haven’t got a better one. So I lay my destiny in Braintec’s hands and wait for the outcome. In the meantime I’ll try to make the tests as good as possible hoping that I’ll find out what I want in time. To behold the possibility to make my own decisions.